Before I start this page of further views of the USA, I should apologize to any that I might offend. These are my own personal views of the USA, or that part of the USA that I have known in the time that I have been living in America.

I have now been living in the USA, or as we still call them the Western Colonies, for two years. And while there is still a lot I either do not understand, or even dislike, I am here and starting to learn a few things.

This Summer, with the joining of a Fantasy Baseball League at work, the Englishman's team if "Just Not Cricket" is surprising a few people who thought I would know nothing about the sport, I am actually following the games, and my players this year.

So let's talk about baseball, through the eyes of an Englishman.

Baseball, the sport of the people, played by men (woman play softball), who earn a fortune, for wearing crash helmets, and a giant oven glove, and trying to hit a ball out of the arena, so they don't have to break into a run to travel round the diamond.

Ok so that's not a great explanation, but it is the national summer sport, played by millions in one form or another. There is after all the World Series at the end of the season, played between the top two teams of the National League and the American league. I know, I know how can a world series take place between nearly (all except two Canadian teams) American teams?

Well it is America, and of course the teams are full of many different nations, from Japan and Australia to Cuba and the Dominican Republic. In fact it would
be really interesting if they ever DID have a true world series.....

It seems one of the major actions in any baseball game is to be able to spit, many eat sunflower seeds, others just seem to be able to produce their own fluid, but spitting it would seem, is a must

Then there are the uniforms, how some of the teams manage to squeeze some of their larger players into those uniforms, well perhaps that could make another chapter.

Players and fans alike though enjoy the game, or seem to no matter what the weather, and the pure joy one sees on the face of a fan, who has actually caught a baseball sent into the crowd, just shows you the thrill? of the game. It is quite amazing to see so many fans of all ages, sitting there, with their large gloves, ready to catch the ball.

Ok, now a baseball, is not as hard as a cricket ball (which for those Colonials, is like a field hockey ball), the players stand further away, for the most part Sure the ball get's hit very hard, and thrown very hard, but so does a cricket ball. Yet in cricket the only one who wares large gloves is the wicket keeper.
I have watched several games where with the glove on the left hand, the ball comes to the right side of the player, and he leaps trying to catch it with his gloved, left hand.
Now if you try and catch a ball on your right, with your left hand, you can not reach as far as if you used your right hand... following me??
So as I was saying I have seen balls go past players, that if they used their right, all be it un-gloved hand they could have reached it.

OK I'll stop at that... but I really have learned..

I now know a "sacrifice fly", isn't an insect that drinks from your beer, and then sits on the bar, waiting to be squashed

I know that "stepping up to the plate" does not mean that dinner is ready

I know that a "stolen base" isn't something that the police need to be got involved with.

I know that "Chipper Jones" is not a person from the local fish and chip shop, and a relieve pitcher, is not a place to get a drink when your thirsty.

I know which team hates which team, a lot of the players, even to having a few favorite players of my own.

But the World Series with only American teams will always get me beat...

JULY 2002

I am, and will always be, an Englishman, living in the USA.

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